Don, Uncurious Commissioner for Life, is now a contractor for chicken giant Chik-fil-A. Between bouts of gout and gas bloating, Don toiled for at least an hour to develop a method to quite literally squeeze profit from reluctant fowl. 

The Egg Efficiency Apparatus, as Mrs. Don named it, provides a guaranteed 20% increase in egg production for the first day.

Don is busily ironing out the second day mortality issue right now!