Da Business

NFL bye weeks continue week 11 and will run through week 14, with no NFL teams on byes for week 13. Week 14 will be the last week the waiver wire will run and that waiver wire you can add a maximum of 3 players and will not be required to drop any rostered players. Rosters will expand to 23 players for the playoffs. Plan accordingly. Please note: week 13 waiver wire will run at 9:30 am PT/12:30 pm ET due to Indigenous People Genocide Remembrance Day. I will send out an email reminder. But make note of the time change for week 13 waivers. One last international game week 11 in Spain. Be cognizant of the international game starts. Week 11 is the last week of the “traditional” head-to-head formatted games. Week 12 will feature head-to-head games based on Total Points Standings (1 vs 12, 2 vs 11, 3 vs 10 etc.) Week 13 will be the last week of the regular season and will feature ALL divisional games (a.k.a. – Position Week). If there is any mathematical chance of the 2^nd place team to catch the 1^st place team for the Division Title the games will be (1 vs 2, 3 vs 4). If the 1^st place team has mathematically clinched the Division Title, as in there is a zero percent chance of the 2^nd place team surpassing the current division leader, the games will be (1 vs 4, 2 vs 3). No line up deadlines. Waiver wire runs on Thursdays, 5 pm PT/8 pm ET. Each team is permitted a maximum of two adds. Must include a drop for each add. No drops. No adds. Each player added is 5 bucks. No scraps. Waiver wire order is reverse order of points standing. Twelve through one round 1. Twelve through one round two. Weekly trade deadline is Fridays 9pm PT/midnight ET. Entry fee is 100 U.S. Dollars. You can Venmo me @Harold-Wenz. Look for the bearded guy wearing a Maybe Next Year t-shirt. Also, I accept PayPal and Zelle. And also, an old-fashioned check in the mail always works.

For The Record

This is for you Day Spa

Veteran’s Day – a U.S. federal holiday on November 11 that honors all who have served in the United States Armed Forces, both living and deceased.

Memorial Day - a U.S. federal holiday observed on the last Monday in May to honor and mourn the men and women who have died while serving in the United States Armed Forces.

Oxymoron – a figure of speech that juxtaposes concepts with opposite meanings within a word or in a phrase that is a self-contradiction. As a rhetorical device, an oxymoron illustrates a point to communicate and reveals a paradox. Example: now batting for the Seattle Mariners, designated hitter, Mitch Gaver.

Cathartic – has two meanings. First definition: in medicine, a cathartic is a substance that accelerates defecation. This is similar to a laxative, which is a substance that eases defecation, usually by softening feces. Second definition: involving the release of strong emotions through a particular activity or experience. Both definitions apply to the example provided for oxymoron. Now batting for the Seattle Mariners, designated hitter, Mitch Garver.

I would like to sincerely thank all the Veteran's out there for their dedicated service to our country. Thank you to the brave men and women that help preserve and maintain the rights and freedoms that we have in our country. It is because of you brave men and women that I am granted the privilege to express my opinions so freely. That is never forgotten.

Breaking News

Hot off the press. This is cutting-edge journalism that you can only get from the Moss Head Commish. None of these NFL insiders can hold a candle to the Moss Head Commish. Adam Schefter? Sleeping at the wheel. Ian Rapoport? More like Ian “no”-report. Mike Garafolo? Better start working on a new portfolio. There was “snowplow” gate, then “spy” gate, then “deflate” gate, but the Moss Head Commish is about to break the biggest New England Patriots scandal ever discovered – “clone” gate. I have confidential informants that have revealed to me that Drake Maye is indeed a genetically modified clone of Tom Brady. The former New England Patriots QB, Tom Brady, is a key investor in a company named Colossal Bioscience, an American biotechnology and genetic engineering company working to de-extinct several extinct animals. The company develops genetic engineering and reproductive technology for conservation biology. In 2023, the head geneticist for the company stated that it wants to have woolly mammoth hybrid calves by 2028 and wants to reintroduce them to the Arctic tundra habitat. Recently, it came to light that Tom Brady had Colossal Bioscience clone his dog. That story broke in order to create a distraction from unveiling the more shocking news that the New England Patriots have been working with Colossal Bioscience since the spring of 2002 to clone Tom Brady. The evidence is overwhelming. Drake Maye is listed by the NFL as 6’ 4” and 225 lbs. Tom Brady was listed by the NFL when he played at 6’ 4” and 225 lbs. Coincidence? Hmm. Both right-handed, both with the uncanny poise in the pocket, laser-sharp accuracy, and the same steely determination. Not to mention a football IQ that can only be genetically inherited rather than learned. Drake Maye’s stat-line in his first 18 games as a starter: 338 completions for 3,527 yards, 22 touchdowns, and 12 interceptions. Tom Brady’s stat-line in his first 18 games as a starter: 319 completions for 3,412 yards, 23 touchdowns, and 13 interceptions. Eerily similar. Tom Brady’s full name is Thomas Edward Patrick Brady. All letters needed to spell Drake Maye are included in Brady’s full name. Tom Brady born on August 3^rd. Drake Maye born on August 30^th. Interesting. Tom Brady born in 1977. One plus 9 plus 14 equals 24. Drake May born in 2002. Twenty plus two = 22. That’s a difference of two. Tom Brady was number 12. Drake Maye is number 10. Subtract 2 from 12 and what do you get? Ahaaaa! Pretty sneaky Patriots.

Around the NFL – Week 10

Break up the Jets. Two wins in a row? Super Bowl. Saints also picked up their second win of the season. Super Bowl. Mike Tomlin still 4 wins away from 19 consecutive winning seasons. It was a good week to be a bad team. Dolphins broke a 7-game losing streak to the Bills and gifted the Patriots sole possession of first place in the AFC East. Speaking of the Patriots, another stomping this week against a team with a winning record. Is this right? I’m actually confused here – I thought the Pats schedule was full of community college teams, rotary clubs and boy scout troops, not actual NFL teams. Maybe there’s a typo somewhere? Are the Seattle Seahawks the best team in the league? They scored 44 points and won by more than 3 TDs with Sam Darnold throwing the ball 12 times and having 3 picks. Crazy. Big test is coming up next week against the Rams where Matthew Stafford is just unconscious right now. He has 22 TD passes and no INTs in the last 8 weeks. This past week Stafford became the only player in NFL history with 4 TD passes and no INTs in three consecutive weeks. Jonathan Taylor put up a fantasy 50-bratwurst in Germany making the Atlanta defense look like a bunch of lederhosen’s. Looks like tuddy-fest comes right after Octoberfest in Germany. Is JSN going to be the first WR with 2000 yards receiving in a single season? He’s got 1041 through 9 games.

THFFL Week 10 Recap – The Battle for the Byes

Dear Mr. Fantasy, play us a tune. Something to make us all happy. Do anything, take us out of this gloom. Sing a song, play guitar, make it snappy. Only 3 more regular season games left and if the season ended today the Scoobs and Day Spa would have the first-round byes and a 5-5 team would get the last playoff spot. But the point is moop cuz there are 3 more games to go and anything can happen. Well almost anything. On the bright side, no team has yet to be eliminated from playoff contention. Comin' out of my cage and I've been doin' just fine. Gotta, gotta be down because I want it all. The game of the week featured two teams with the best record in the THFFL at 7-2 and it was a huge game with the winner getting the inside track to that coveted first round bye as Day Spa battled Danger Russ. I sincerely don’t mean any disrespect to Day Spa, as clearly, they are the cream of the THFFL now at 8-2 but how is Day Spa pulling this off? It’s smoke and mirrors. Bo Nix and Tyler Shough? Does that sound like a fantasy football championship starting duo? Just saying. I’m scratching my head. But hey not only is Day Spa in line for a first round bye, but they are also the top scoring team in the league. This week’s matchup between Day Spa and Danger Russ featured the top 2 total points leaders to date. Another impressive 140+ week for Day Spa and that marks the 8^th week in which Day Spa has scored at least 130 points. Remarkable. It took 10 weeks, but the patience may have paid off as TreVeyon with his best fantasy performance of the season with 29 points and Day Spa needed every last morsel with James Cook in single digits. Danger Russ got another stinker from Bijan, now 3 consecutive weeks with single digit fantasy outputs. Gotta be making Russ a tad bit concerned. Good news, bad news for Danger Russ. Good news is that the 28 Goff points on the bench was not a difference maker. Bad news with the loss Russ falls all the way to the 3 seed. The other current bye week holder the Scoobie Doobies cruised to another easy victory 142-92 over Toe Cheese. How the mighty have fallen. Toe Cheese once 4-0 has now lost 6 straight games and sits at 4-6 on the outside looking in from a playoff perspective. Contrastingly, the Scoobs keep right on rolling at 8-2. Achane led the way for the Scoobs with a 37-burger and welcome back Emeka Egbuka. In the category of how the mighty have fallen, what is going on with TWT? Yikes. Another drubbing in week 10 as they get annihilated by Rico 142-78. A huge win for Rico to get back to five hundred and throw their hat back in the ring for that last wild card spot. Rico only needed 4 starters to get past TWT with Allen, Dart, Meyers and the Rams posting 79 points combined. I wouldn’t want to face Uncle Rico in a one game survive and advance playoff game. This roster has the potential to make a fat run. And TWT, well they look like they are pretty much done. Which brings us to the Reefer and Number 9. Another critical matchup with both teams at 4-5 and looking to crawl back into the playoff conversation at five hundred. The Reefer got the memo. Number 9, aah I don’t know about that. Only one double digit starter for N9 with 19 from Mariota, and an oxymoron donut from Kenneth Gain-well. Uhh, not so much. A donut in primetime vs the Chargers? That defies so many fantasy rules I don’t even know where to begin. Every rose has its thorn. Just like every night has its dawn. Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song. Every rose has its thorn. Grim Reefer finds themselves back in the hunt with a perfect 100% optimized lineup in week 10. Number 9 not out of the picture yet, but he’s gonna need some help the next couple of weeks. Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends. Mm I get high with a little help from my friends. Oh, I'm gonna try with a little help from my friends. Is Saquon trying to make a miracle run for the Cup? Back-to-back wins against playoff contenders have Saquon at 3-7 and tickling the postseason tonsils. Two games out of the theoretical 5-5 playoff bubble. Astral and Saquon went down to the proverbial wire in this matchup. It was pretty intense. Saquon went into Monday Night up 124-122 with Barkley left to play and Astral down 2 points with Jordan Love. A hard fought defensive battle between the Packers and Eagles did not lend itself well to either player as they could only muster 10 points a piece as Saquon holds on for the 2-point nailbiter that could either be a season saving victory or just another meaningless win in the inevitability of the fantasy football random universe. Tough loss for Astral as Love and the Packers had the ball in the last minute and driving into FG range but it was not meant to be this time around. Dear Mr. Fantasy, play us a tune. Something to make us all happy. Do anything, take us out of this gloom. Sing a song, play guitar, make it snappy.

Just Another Lizard For Peace