The Death of Karma in the THFFL: A Reckoning for the Commissioner of Karma

Breaking news from RT Sports. This just in from THFFL headquarters, after nearly 30-years as the ambassador for karma, encompassing three fantasy football leagues, spanning from coast to coast, across three decades, the Karma Commish has resigned as Commissioner of the THFFL. A press conference will be held at Karma Commish headquarters in the near future to announce the Commissioner’s successor – Moss Head Commish. But for now, let’s cut to Lake Steven’s, Washington where the Karma Commish will address the fantasy football nation.

(Karma Commish enters the press conference and approaches the podium)

“My fellow THFFL-ers, it is with great sadness and remorse that I must announce my resignation as Karma Commish, effective immediately. We started on this venture almost 30 years ago, some of you in this room have been with me from the start as we pioneered fantasy football pre-internets in Hopatcong, NJ in the WHFFL. For those of you who have continued the journey with me throughout the years, I thank you for your patronage, your dedication and your fortitude. Some of you remained with me as we forged new frontiers into the KFFL and also into the current THFFL. Franchises came and went, but there was always one constant and that was “karma” always prevailed. The notion of “karma” – an invisible force balancing virtue and immorality has comforted the hopeful pleco’s of fantasy football. Karma once seemed woven into the very fabric of every fantasy draft and was a driving force of many championship runs for the Karma Cup. Today, this comforting illusion lies in ruins. Fantasy football is a microcosm of society, and we live in a world where it is commonplace to embrace evil and disgraceful ethics for trivial rewards. I, Karma Commish, can no longer withstand the dismissal of one of my most cherished mantras. The myth of just rewards has been equivocally disregarded. There was a time, long, long ago when the power of karma pulsated through the veins of my leagues. League message boards raved of poetic justice. Altruism was rewarded with karma. My fantasy football leagues were always more than probability, more than data. My leagues were a safe haven for cosmic justice. But there has been a great and calamitous shift in the paradigm. Algorithms dictate draft selections and spreadsheets, and inferential statistics became oracles. Armchair pundits are chastised and ridiculed for the mere suggestion of supporting “good vibes only” rosters. Fantasy managers are now armed with new age tools of predictive modelling and real-time news alerts. There is no comradery or compassion for fellow league members. Oh, how I long for the days of gathering together and breaking bread with my fellow league members on that glorious draft day. Now we draft in cyber-space, in the comfort of zoom rooms and with callous, calculated intentions. The notion of Taylor ham and cheese sandwiches, beer balls and bong-o-matic 5000’s have transitioned to laptops, smartphones and artificial intelligence. The tides have taken a turn. Loyalty to beloved fantasy players is a liability and drafting with a moral consciousness is a likely path to the Pleco playoffs. Yes, luck has always walked hand-in-hand with karma, but as we emerge into the “new” ways of fantasy football, karma and luck, become relics, replaced by a culture of ruthless optimization. But it is only fair that the strong shall survive and the weak shall perish. Evolution is inevitable, a force that karma could never contend with even it it’s most abundant state. Thus, with the death of karma comes the triumph of evolution. In closing, I wish you all happiness in pursuit of fantasy championships. It is my hope that the new Commissioner – The Moss Head Commissioner, will keep the name of the trophy as the Karma Cup, in honor of this long-standing tradition and to embrace all the franchise owners who once believed in its mystique and wonder and who held on to the notion that “good things will eventually come to good people”. A notion that has died on the vine of fantasy sports everywhere. I leave you with this last sentiment. Karma was not merely a hope for personal reward, but rather a notion and a hope for communal ethos. Without karma, what remains in its absence is simply an empty solitary pursuit in a meaningless endeavor. We lay karma to rest today in the THFFL, and we forge ahead without remorse, without guilt, without prejudicial judgement. Best of luck to all in that pursuit of that elusive championship. Always remember, reach out your hand, if your cup be empty. If your cup is full, may it be again!"

Just Another Lizard For Peace